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Bicyclists

Bikes-a-plenty

Gas is expensive and Americans, in general, are lazy. So what can we do to rectify both problems with one stone? Ride bicycles. Bikes are an eco-friendly, healthy way to get to where you need to go as long as you live within reasonable distance. Portland is often referred to as the bicycling capital of the US, and for good reason - we have tons of trails around the area and practically every street has a seperate bike-only lane, making it convenient and easy to start riding.

Here’s the problem with the hardcore bicyclists - they don’t follow the rules. They go from street rules to pedestrian rules as they please, and that just ain’t cool. This morning I was reminded twice about why I don’t like bicyclists.

Driving Activities

These are driving activities I’d like to do sometime:

  1. Take a road trip making only left turns.  I saw this in a commercial last night and it reminded me that I had this same idea a few years ago.
  2. Leave the house in the morning and follow the first moving car that I see.  Once they get to where they’re goin’ then I’ll follow the next moving car that I see. If they notice that I’m tailing them and they stop to ask why, I’ll just say, “Hi, I’m following you.  You don’t mind, right?  Great.”  Rinse and repeat.
  3. Go the speed limit for an entire rush hour with a miniature platoon of like-minded drivers, thus enducing severe road rage in all who are out-of-the-know.  Here’s my path, starting here in Hillsburrito:
    1. We’d make our way down Hwy 26 East to I-405 North;
    2. head down I-5 South to I-205 North;
    3. go all the way up to, and then onto, I-84 West;
    4. take I-5 North through Vancouver to I-205 South;
    5. take I-205 South to I-5 North;
    6. finally, we’d head back into downtown Portland and call it a day.

My aim: To cause a ruckus. :)
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