Dean(ish)

Why, Nintendo, did you pick such a shitty name? Sure, we’ll get over it, but I promise you that there are people out there who will absolutely refuse to purchase a system that’s supposed to sound like a nickname for “urination.”

as sexy as a video game machine can get

Even though I am strongly opposed to the name, I won’t be one of those people who don’t buy it because of something as shallow as a name. In fact, I will definitely be getting a Why as soon as it comes out. I am very frustrated by the decision, as are many Nintendo die-hards who were perfectly happy with the - *cringe* - Wii’s codename: Revolution. Sure, the name Revolution will get dated, but it’s a helluva lot cooler than - *cringe* - Wii.

Nintendo should’ve come up with a better name. “Wii” is just awful. But like I said, I am looking forward to its release. A game on the - *cringe* - Wii will be like no other because it is so unique.

the infrared - *cringe* - Wii controller will prove to be bad-ass (in a good way)

André pointed out that anyone on the fence of liking or disliking the - *cringe* - Wii will now surely be on the opposite side and running away as fast as possible. While this may be true, we need to consider what Nintendo’s really after: a new audience.

The gamers of yore have grown up and evolved. They need more eye-candy. They need graphics like the XBox 360 and PS3 will provide. Nintendo’s not even trying in this market. Instead, Nintendo’s going to a market that doesn’t exist yet. There are way more people who don’t play games than those who do; Nintendo is trying to capitalize on that, and I think they’re actually taking a step in that direction. Whether it’s the right direction or not remains to be seen.

The - *cringe* - Wii will be a great system for games like Nintendogs - one will actually be able to have a sense of throwing a ball. Or fishing simulators - you’ll be able to throw the line. You’ll be able to pilot an airplane. You’ll be able to draw, swordfight, hit baseballs, play tennis, and kill zombies in ways never before possible for a console system of this magnitude. Lots of games will take advantage of the technology. It’s certainly no X360 in terms of raw performance, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be as (if not more) entertaining.

the controller at all angles

Consider how many people flock to Animal Crossing, the virtual alternative to an ancient practice otherwise known as “friendship”. People love that game, and Nintendo’s doing everything they can to corner that kind of social antisocial market - make friends in Nintendoland without leaving your house.

I think they could make it big with this one but Nintendo desperately needs to come out with some more adult-appealing games. How many versions of Mario Party are there? Too many. Those games probably hold the interest of most adults for about as long as a game of Candyland, and then it’s old. However, as many of us are aware, Halo was at the top of the gaming charts for a looooooooong time. Nintendo needs a Halo, but also needs to stop regurgitating old names like Metroid and Zelda and making them “new;” they need to just make something new altogether. That will sell. That will get the current gaming community to buy a - *cringe* - Wii. I realize Nintendo’s after the “non-existant” market, but the current market sure would be a great place to start, don’tcha think?

In conclusion, obviously I have mixed feelings about the - *cringe* - Wii. I will love the system; I already know this. I just despise the name. Honestly, Nintendo could call this thing “Shit Brick Q476.$” and that wouldn’t stop me from wanting one; I just wanna swing Link’s sword.

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